Thursday, October 04, 2007

Too Much Rod Benson

Rod's got a new blog post up. It's about fixing his XBOX 360, Adam Duritz's rockstar bathroom, softball with his cousin Jason Kidd, pingpong, training camp, and my new favorite NBA player, Jamaal Magloire:

...And then there's Jamaal Magloire. The thing about him, what makes him blog worthy I should say, is that he is just like Lil John. No, he doesn't have dreadlocks. No, he doesnt rap (to my knowledge). No, he is not from the ATL. Actually, he is probably nothing like Lil John. He is actually more like Dave Chappelles version of LIl John. If you have ever seen "A Moment in the Life of Lil John", then you know that Lil John talks with the utmost clarity, calm, and annunciation most of the time, but every now and then he gets crunk and goes "YEEAAAHHHH", "WHAATTTTT?", or "OOOKAAAAYYYY!". Basically there are two sides to him. The first time I played on the same court as Jamaal, I noticed that he is kind of a wild man. He plays like a beast, but that aint the half. He literally yells out different words depending on the situation kind of the way Lil John does. He was yelling and grunting and causing a scene. Immediately after the game, he walked over to me and said, in the most perfect english I may have ever heard, "Hello. My name is Jamaal. Aren't you so excited for the upcoming season? That's when the money comes."

I was astonished. I was thinking that there is no way this is the same guy. Its like seeing the incredible hulk turn back into Bruce Banner. This guy is so animated that you dont even have to watch the game to know whats going on. He gives his own play by play. I have composed a short list of these sounds/sayings and what they mean:

When you hear this, it means that he was just fouled, probably while attempting a shot.
This means he has just blocked a shot.
Sounds similar to the seagulls from "finding nemo". You hear this when he grabs a rebound.
4. "YESSS!"
He is open. Get him the coddamn ball.

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